Help ER play with The Offspring

We might get to share the main stage of this year's Big Ass Show with The Offspring. But we need your help, vote for us with this link. There's even a Cinderella story: as of this posting, we're DEAD LAST. That means that you can take us from the very bottom to the very top, just by clicking here:

Click here and then click 'Vote!' under Elizabethan Report

and by clicking 'Vote!' by our name. While you're there, you can listen to a full preview of I Think I Care. We can do this, y'all.

Last weekend we took the Beauville (pictured below) all the way up to Logan to play a huge graduation party. We had the rock stage, and after our show, we went to the main room where there was a huge hip hop party. Who knew Logan had enough people to fill a large club?

I want you all to know that we're playing with the Vivian Girls this Saturday in Salt Lake at Kilby Court. Click here to say yes for yourself on Facebook. The Vivian Girls rock so much, they're from a really happening scene in Brooklyn that feeds the drones of sixties bands once forgotten. So come, it's going to be a good time.


Elizabethan Report drives a 1992 Chevy Beauville. It's like driving a small but beautiful city. Thanks to Robbie for taking this photo.

Funky Monks

Elizabethan Report watched this documentary about the Red Hot Chili Peppers the other night. Lucky for you, I found the whole thing on google video. Got an hour? This is possibly worth your time. I say possibly not because you wouldn't be interested, nor because the film making is lacking. Au contraire, user-bags, it's equally entertaining as it is well done. I just want to respect the fact that you might have your own thing going on in the next hour or so. But if it turns out that you were just Facebooking instead of seeing something that could have inspired you, I'm not going to hang out with you for like thirteen days.

Murderer? on iTunes

We have some very special news for you. ER's new album Are you a murderer? is available at iTunes and other mp3 stores online everywhere. Released April 15, It's a present to you for doing your taxes and sticking it out to the end. Best of all, if you want a real copy, click Big Cartel below and you can have it shipped to wherever you live. Just pick the store you want from below.

Some cool shows are coming up, so get ready.

My best to you, because my best + your best = we are all unusually attractive.

mp3 stores:
iTunes
Amazon
Rhapsody
Napster
Amie Street
Lala
eMusic
Shockhound

Big Cartel (have CDs shipped to your house)

In the Land of the Premier Tribute Bands

It seems like almost every band that has ever found at least a moderate taste of fame and success will find its doppelganger in L.A. It doesn't matter how irrelevant the original band may be, they will most likely have a tribute band that doesn't just claim to be an above average tribute band, but claims they are the PREMIER tribute band to that band. The list of bands being tributed is endless: Megadeath, The Pretenders, Metallica, Ozzy, Joe Satriani, Steve Vai, Pat Benatar, and Dokken. That's right. Pat Benatar and Dokken have premier tribute bands. Some of these bands names are clever, and some not so much. For instance, Caress of Steel is the premier tribute band for Rush, while Blonde Jovi is an all female tribute band to Bon Jovi.

You may be asking yourself, "Why? Where's the audience for said premier tribute bands? This sounds like some sort of strange post-modern joke. Is David Lynch running the show from behind the Oz-like curtain?" Then someone may answer from afar, "Well, tribute bands are really hot right now." Really? Well, the bouncer at one of L.A.'s clubs, Paladino's in the Valley (Rocking the Valley since the dawn of time) was all about tribute bands. He told us that whenever the tribute band for Dokken plays there, the lead singer of the real band Dokken attends, watching the show from a table and signing autographs.

This got me thinking. In the spirit of Dokken, I've formulated a plan to quit Elizabethan Report and start up the premier tribute band to Elizabethan Report. I would beat everyone else to the punch, especially since we're not all that famous yet, and it would definitely be the premier tribute band to the ER if I were to be the lead singer. The only way that I could see another ER premier tribute band being more premier than my premier tribute band would be if they got Philip Seymour Hoffman to be the front man. He'd probably have a better grasp on my nuances and idiosyncrasies than I would. The same could be said of Denzel Washington (one of the greatest actors of our lifetime), only he'd have to perform in white face. Unfortunately, the controversy surrounding his performance would distract so much from the subtle, soul searching performance of me he'd give, that people would miss perhaps the greatest performance of his career or anyone's career in the history of this world or any other world.

-Tony Petersen

Floppy Hobby

My man Davey Hawkins, who I'm gonna be helping out with his Hip Hop project, told me about this insane blog that you all need to check out. You know the ball room at Discovery Zone or the McDonald's Play Place? It's kind of like that, but for words. Super fun, no narrative, you never know what you're going to find in there.

kingryeguy.blogspot.com

Come to our show Saturday, it's going to be the jam on your toast.

Flaming Mouth

What up world/peoples? How are you this day? Cloudy with a little mist? Are you tired from all your hard work last night sleeping with your problems and not your soul mate? Come here, child. Let me wipe down those balloon sized tears, and we can stomp in the puddles they make. Do you have a pup? Is he ready for what we're about to get into? Dogs don't care, they just go on their whims. Maybe the dog should be the leader, that way if we get into trouble, the cops will just lean back and laugh all the day long. Just you, me, the dog, and a couple of cokes. In bottles, unscrewed by a happy brown-skinned man behind the counter with the mustache that never gets mowed.

Let's start by hopping roofs. There's a picnic on that one, let's drop over there. The dog's going crazy on the wienies, his head sunk over the lip of the grill. I hope the flaming mouth doesn't swallow him before he's done. Good thing these people don't mind sharing cups, they don't even blink at what Pup's been up to. Only Grandma rocks in the rocker, gnashing at the frolicking, one rock away from falling back off the roof, to hit hell running. But where would anybody be without her?

Grab a potato salad with one hand, and we're fresh out of here as it smears down your arm. Don't worry, you're hungry. You eat and I'll fly. I haven't felt like this in years! Let's set up a tent above where it rains from, and the dog can be the pillow. You won't fall down if you close the zippers tight. Ready, set, stop.

Tide

Tony and Hillery star in this Tide commercial directed by Cole Webley. Hope you enjoy!

ER got back from Colorado last night. Thanks to Kameljit from Durango and Tom at the Moon for their kindness. Everyone stop by Fly Me to the Moon Saloon in Telluride, Colorado sometime. Sublime, Phish, and many more have played there, including yours truly.

Pregnant

Live at Whiskey a Go Go
March 20, 2009